Monday, June 8, 2009
I gotta say it's just a whole shitting stuff.
i really messed thing up and a dumb loser..
i obviously want to get over this..
things came out and i got wrecked.
it's really scary and it is totally a nightmare..
that had been haunting me during my schooltime and now. it's back
stay away from me..
i tried my best to ignore u and be a good girl..
i am supposed to stay optimistic but then it broke down and ..
i am tired of all that.
I am not ostensibly a bad girl.. do nothing to change the truth..
It's just all my destiny..
I tried my best to improve myself but hell then..
the result is rubbish.. I wondered who I am and what i am doing on this earth?
My parents gave birth to me with a hope of another better life..
but i continuously caused them in trouble..
I am a filial child at home but it's not enough..
they always worried about me from time to time..
they probably dropped tears and fazed all the time..
i have been trying to make them happy and proud of me..
but sorry... i just made them happy but they aren't proud of me..
they spent so much money on me, in order to help me pursue this course...
Sometimes, i want to go back and took the test again .. but i am absent-minded , not encouraging...
For some reasons, they confused me a lot . And the fact that i was really deep down at that time.. i feel so guilty.. i am a shit troublesome child..
i glanced at their eyes and saw the disappointment filling up their minds.
I murmured why i was born in this world?
haha.. i got the reason: to make ppl confused and mess things up
They occasionally looked at other's children with desirous eyes.. They once told me that:" when i look at other's children, i desire to have those children, but I.."
I just chuckled silently and said nothing..
I really wanted to go away... as far as i can.. in order not to make them upset once again.. but nope... i didn't do that... cuz i thought that although they aren't proud of me, but i will try my best to make them feel content and satisfied with me( just i deserve to get their sacrifice)...
* choking*
Ava: credit to the creater:D.. sorry that i dun who made this:D
; 8:48 PM
I gotta say it's just a whole shitting stuff.